Tax season is this way every time; the difference right now is that I have the added bonus of being in charge of pushing a new tracking program live right in the middle of it. It’s been a ton of work and extremely stressful, as it’s fallen nearly entirely on my shoulders, but we’re super close to letting the staff loose on it. I’ll be so happy when it’s done; it’s consumed my entire life lately. I think about the stupid program ALL the time. I want my brain back, please and thank you.

I mentioned that I was going to go to a Bar Method class a while back. I was originally supposed to go on Saturday, but opted out due to my mysterious hurty hip (which, by the way, has been fine since Sunday… so weird), so I rescheduled for after work on Tuesday. My friend Rowena was super jazzed that I chose that day because the BEST instructor leads that particular class. I’m not sure what I thought she meant by best, but she actually meant TOUGHEST.

Y’all, I know I haven’t worked out in a while. I know I’m not in the best shape. I know this. But seriously? My legs were shaking five minutes into the warm up. The WARM UP. You know what else hurt? The cool down. THE COOL DOWN IS NOT SUPPOSED TO HURT. But it did.

This looks like nothing, but it HURTS.

But here’s what: I finished the class. I did the entire hour. I took a ten second break here and there for water, but sweated and tucked and EMBRACED THE SHAKE (as Courtney, the instructor, kept yelling at me to do) and stayed “in the muscle” and I finished. For that, I was pretty proud. And I felt great afterward! The only problem was that I was so wired that I couldn’t sleep. A 6:45pm workout followed by a 10pm dinner may not be the best idea for me.

Also? The classes are expensive. Like, pretty much right out of my budget expensive. I love that my friends are so excited about it and addicted to it, and honestly, I probably would be too if my wallet weren’t strapped so tightly right now. The fact is, though, that I simply cannot afford to take the classes. Whomp.

I decided that I’m not going to let this keep me from getting back into a fitness routine, though. I set my alarm for 4:30 this morning and even slept in my work out clothes so I wouldn’t be tempted to bail on getting up and at it. When my alarm went off, I raised up on my arms and said,

OHMYGODOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW!

That class kicked my butt so good that I’m still sore. It hurts to turn my steering wheel, and yes, I have power steering. It’s that much OW.

I’m aiming for tomorrow morning instead. I’ll report back.

I have also taken the opportunity to dive head first back into clean eating this week. I was super careful with everything I purchased and read labels two and three times over to make sure I wasn’t getting any crazy hidden sugar. I’ve been pre-making my meals days in advance, which has helped a lot, and actually went out and bought Tosca Reno’s book. It’s easier to stay motivated when I’ve got something staring me in the face, so it’s nice to have it handy to refer back to. I feel a lot better, even only four days in, and I’ve already lost a pound. This whole healthy thing really works. Who knew?

How is it that it’s 7:45pm and I’m ready for bed? Ah, well. Probably better this way. 4:30 comes early.

xo – Heather.

The first photo I took for the challenge, of course, was run through Instagram and filtered. I liked the way it turned out, but after I thought about it for a minute, it wasn’t true to the nature of the challenge. What you’re seeing here is me, unfiltered and fresh-faced – and yes, a little blotchy.

What you can’t see here is the patch of eyebrow that I yanked out during a misguided and ultimately failed attempt at waxing my own eyebrows this evening. Seriously, that shit is not as easy as it looks (or else I’m really just that big a mess – probably the latter).

Tonight, I encourage you all to do something to step out of your comfort zone. It doesn’t have to be THIS, and it doesn’t have to be tonight, but you should do something. It’ll be neat, promise.

xo – Heather.

* Sugar is a sneaky devil! I started paying more attention to labels and found that I haven’t been as sugar free as I thought. Here is a handy list of all the names sugar masquerades as on nutrition labels.

* Are you reading Harper’s Happenings? It’s one of my favorite blogs and Mandy is now in a Levi’s commercial. She’s totally adorable. Check out the blog and the commercial.

* I am going to make a shitbunch of these out of pages from old books and hang them from the ceiling of my new bedroom. I am also accepting volunteers to help, because I don’t know if you know how much a shitbunch is, but it’s only slightly less than a fuckton.

* Whirly Bird posted this video of Mr. Happy Man on Valentine’s Day. He has such a sweet spirit; if only more people (myself included) felt the love that he does every single day.

I am really hoping for a low-key Sunday. My hip started hurting Friday night (what am I, freakin’ eighty?), and Saturday morning I could barely move. Of course, I didn’t let that stop me from driving a U-Haul 80 miles round trip to get my new couch and I just said pffffft to any rest because I am super, super smart. Long story short, a low-key Sunday would really probably help my half-brained Saturday.

What are y’all up to today, hm?

xo – Heather.

Day 12: Inside your closet. You can definitely see a glimpse of my addiction to stripes here.

Day 13: Blue. I took a photo of my computer desktop; it was rainy and grey, and I was in my office all day. This was the only blue to be seen.

Day 14: Heart.

Day 15: Phone. OR IS IT.

Day 16: Something new.

Day 17: Time. Out of the house since 6:30am, and this is when I finally arrived back home. Shwew.

Day 18: Drink. This morning was crisp and cool… wish I’d actually have been able to sip on a Max Brenner drink. I settled for my standard coffee instead.

Are any of you guys participating in this photo challenge? I’d love to see your collections, too.

xo – Heather.

Obsessing over: my move out plan. I keep going over budgets, reworking figures and timelines and making sure everything is going to be just right. I still have a lot of things to get that I hadn’t even considered before – an iron, a microwave, a vacuum cleaner. I’m getting there… baby steps.

Working on: maintaining my zen in stressful situations. I work in a very high stress environment, especially this time of year; it’s very busy and everything has to be done five minutes ago. I really like my boss, but he can be a bit difficult to work for sometimes, and today half the department called out sick! With my anxiety, it’s really important for me to keep things in perspective and remain as calm as I possibly can and so far, I’ve been doing a pretty good job. At one point today, I had three people in my office asking me about three different things at the same time while five tax returns were in varying stages of assembly on my desk and I started to feel a twinge of a panic attack coming on. I was able to ward it off, though, and that’s huge for me.

Thinking about: all the stuff I have to do tomorrow! I’m doing a Bar Method class with my friend Wena in the morning, picking up my couch midday and heading into the office for a bit in the late afternoon. I also need to fit grocery shopping in there somewhere, so that Sunday can be all laundry and furniture shopping. Hell, I’ve got a lot to do Sunday, too.

Anticipating: some hefty overtime on my next paycheck, which will help immensely in getting a new dining room set and bed for Jake. I was going to get a dinette from Craigslist this weekend, but after thinking about it I determined I was “panic buying” and that I’d rather wait a bit and get something that is exactly what I want. The set was nice and in really good condition; it just wasn’t what I had in mind. If my apartment can’t be my dream apartment, I at least want to love the stuff that’s in it, and all of my upcoming overtime will help me do just that.

Listening to: Handsome Furs. My friend Terry turned me onto them a couple of years ago, and they never get old. Plus, the band is a married couple. How cute is that?

Eating: everything I shouldn’t be, but without really knowing it. I mean, yes, I know that there was sugar in the cupcake cupcakes I ate the other day, but I had no idea there was sugar in my soy creamer I’ve been using in my coffee! All this time I thought I was on a no sugar diet, I was wrong. Whomp. Oh, well… lesson learned: read labels.

Wishing: that my family was SO much closer. Seeing my niece last week was THE BEST, but it made me really miss the rest of my family SO much more. I’m hoping they make good on their promise of a gigantic trip to San Diego. Soon. VERY soon.

Linking up with Danielle at Sometimes Sweet. Play along!

xo – Heather

It hasn’t actually FULLY come together yet, but man… it’s trucking right along and has been a lot easier than I thought it would be so far.

When I first found out that my MIL was going to sell the house, like I said before, I fuh-reaked out. I make decent money, but after taxes and what not my take home isn’t all that much. It was enough for a one bedroom apartment, but hello… not sharing a room with my kid, and certainly not making one of us sleep in the living room because HOLY INCONVENIENCE FOR EVERYONE. So where that left us was in a one-notch-above-slum-status apartment with no cable or internet, but a roof! And a kitchen! And a bathroom! And we should be glad for this, yes!

But I wasn’t glad. Not even a little bit. I was worried like heck about how everything was going to work, and how I was going to survive without internet (yes, I know… I know) and just… well, everything. I was talking it out with my work BFF, who is also the assistant office manager, and she gave me this really puzzled look. “Heather,” she said, “I know how much you make. You really shouldn’t be that tight on money and in that crappy of an apartment. What are you claiming for your deductions? Did you go according to the worksheet?” I looked at her sheepishly and said, “Rachel, how is it that I’ve worked for TWO different tax firms, but have just arbitrarily claimed zero on my W4s since, oh, I don’t know, THE DAWN OF TIME?”

I know. I know.

Doing the worksheet and claiming the proper amount of deductions resulted in what I consider a FAT raise. Like, an extra $500 – $600 per month. And yeah, maybe I won’t get as fat a refund every year, but I need that money NOW, not next year. Gimme.

Since the change goes into effect on this paycheck, I started looking for furniture and have been hugely successful. I will be picking up this baby on Saturday:

Three years old and a steal for $200. I will also be picking up a used Ikea dining room set for $60. Basically, right now, I win at Craigslisting (yep, I just verbed the crap outta that noun). I’ll be storing the couch in my friend’s garage until I’m ready to move. At this rate, I’m figuring I can be ready in six weeks or so; most of the big stuff is out of the way now (aside from Jake’s bed), and I just need little things like a vacuum, microwave, and new bathroom items.

I still will not be in my dream apartment (I don’t think that exists in good ol’ Escondido, sad to say), but I will not be in super slummy ick-town either. I’ll have lights and water and internet and cable and a big comfy couch and a place to eat, though. Me and my kid will have our own space, and a space to hang out together. Everything will be ours.

I can’t wait. I really, really can’t wait.

xo – Heather.

* James has one of the most loving, beautiful families in the world, and her wedding pictures capture it all so beautifully.

* This.

x0 – Heather.

Day 5: 10 am. Subtitle: “It takes a lot of money to look this cheap.”

Day 6: Dinner. Working late. =/

Day 7: Button.

Day 8: Sun.

Day 9: Front door.

Day 10: Self-portrait.

Day 11: Makes me happy.

You can certainly tell there were a few days this week where I was feeling rushed and/or uninspired. Meh. Here’s to making next week prettier.

xo – Heather.

2. One thing I love seeing on other blogs is truth. Truth according to who the person writing is. I am all about positivity, but I want to know when things aren’t so great, too. It makes bloggers more interesting and easy to relate to when they are all-around honest.

3. Something I love about blogging is that if I ever need to get something off my chest, I have a place to do it. It sounds strange, but sometimes I don’t want to call a friend and ramble on about whatever I’m peeved about at the given time. I’d much rather put it on the internet and at least give folks a choice to read it or not..

4. A favorite blog post of mine is probably this one.

5. Something my friends in real life know about me that I’ve never before mentioned on my blog is um… well, huh. I don’t really know. I’m a pretty open book, both here and in real life.

6. My new favorite blog to read is My New Roots. She’s got such a great take on food, and uses what is in season to make her meals. Not only that, but she will tell you exactly why each ingredient is good for you. Love.

7. Something I tend to avoid doing on my blog is being negative. That’s actually a trait that I’m trying to curb all around. Obviously, things are not always going to be peachy and I know that – see blank number two. :) But as much as I can, I’m really trying to be a positive force. There’s already too much negativity out there, I don’t need to contribute to it.

Play along!

Originally, I was scheduled to work today (during tax season, I assist the admin team in assembling returns, meaning mucho overtime) but due to co-worker’s childcare arrangements I was rescheduled. Both kids are with their dad this weekend, so I took the opportunity to take myself on a date.  I grabbed my Nook and set off for downtown Escondido.

I was hoping to try this place for an early lunch, but they don’t open until 3pm so I walked next door to the California Avocado Grill. Now, in case you haven’t picked up on this with my food photos, I’m a HUGE fan of the avocado. Some might say I am borderline obsessed. I will put avocado on ANYTHING, damn near, and I eat at least one per day. In addition to being delicious, they are good for you (although slightly high calorie) so I kind of use that as an excuse to eat them as much as possible. So this restaurant is based entirely around my favorite fruit, and I damn near lost my mind.

What we’re looking at here, folks, is an avocado caprese salad and a crab salad stuffed “half-shell” avocado. It was pure heaven. I would never have thought to add avocado to a caprese salad before, but now I’m not sure I’ll ever eat one without it again. Amazing. I had a pot of green tea, and sat on the patio on Grand Avenue, nibbled my food and read my Nook (I’m currently reading this, if you’re wondering). Downtown Escondido is a little sleepy on the weekends, so it was really peaceful and lovely.

There is a really great antique mall right across the street from the restaurant, so I wandered over there when I was done eating. There were some really great items I may need to go back and pick up for my new place next payday, including an amazing dresser and a working rotary phone. Okay, the phone isn’t necessary, but it’ll look way cool.

Hooded sweater: F21 (like, eight years ago), tank: Target, jeans: H&M, leopard flats: H&M, belt: Target

I made one more stop at Sprouts before heading home and purchased what I believe is, well,  only the greatest lotion in the world.

Seriously. Cruelty free, nearly 98% natural. Makes my skin feel like velvet. Yum.

Do me a favor, will you? If you have the opportunity today or tomorrow, treat yourself. Take yourself on a little date. Do something that is just for you, and then tell me about it. I want to see all the nice little things people do for themselves.

xo – Heather.

I found out yesterday, in a very nonchalant and indirect manner, that my mother-in-law is planning to sell the house that I’m currently living in.

Let the panic begin!

Mind you, I am in no way angry or upset that she’s selling – it’s her house, she’s not working and it’s a hefty mortgage. I absolutely don’t blame her. Am I a little miffed over how I found out? Yes. Hrmph.

I immediately started crunching numbers and trying to figure out if I will even be able to support Jake and myself on my current salary, and freaked out more when I figured out that I will have basically zero dollars left at the end of the month when I take into consideration all bills and cost of living – minus cable and internet, even. Oof.

I stressed myself into early sleep last night – knocked out cold around 9:30. Do not pass go.

This morning, I started to feel much better about the whole thing. I had already planned to be out of her house by mid-2013 at the latest, so I’m just getting a little head start. I’ve begun formulating a plan of things that need to happen over the next few months – tracking down Jake’s birth certificate, applying for rent assistance, shopping for inexpensive furniture and the like. I know I will not have my dream apartment. I know we may have to live without a few extras for a while. It will not be easy, and I know all this, and I’m okay with it.

Because honestly? It will be SO nice to be in my own place again, with all of my own stuff, and not confined to my one little bedroom all the time. It will be nice to know where all of my tupperware is (sounds funny, but this is a very serious issue in my current arrangement). It will be nice to get Jake’s room set up in a way that doesn’t look like he’s a temporary guest. It will be nice to have my own little spot to call home.

So you know what, great curveball of life? Keep coming. No, really, keep right on coming. You might knock me down for a second or two, but I feel that much greater when I realize I can TOTALLY TAKE YOU.

xo – Heather.